MOVIE REVIEW: Hostel Part II

One critic has gone as far as to say that "Hostel Part II" sets the horror genre back a decade. I say that critic is full of shit. "Hostel Part II" pretty much assassinates the genre. A decade? THAT'S ALL? Eli Roth, what have you become? I liked "Cabin Fever." His "Thanksgiving" trailer during "Grindhouse" was a highlight for me. I actually hated the first "Hostel." It is sadly a bunch of shit. It was violence for the sake of violence. Let's see how much gore we can include, just because we can. At least the "Saw" franchise is intriguing. It has a plot and a reason to exist. The violence helps move the plot along.
"Hostel Part II" begins with Paxton, which we know as the survivor from the original film. He is hiding out in the country with his girlfriend. Yeah, so he gets killed. Then we move to Rome where we meet three women (think the three guys from the original, only with vaginas). So they get tricked into going to a Hostel by a hot chick who clearly wants some lesbian action, which we sadly never get. Thanks, Roth. So one by one they disappear. One dies in a blood bath. No literally. She is hung upside down from the ceiling and a woman lies underneath. She then cuts the shit out of her and basks in the flow. Another girl gets a circular saw in the face and the final girl makes it out alive after chopping a guy's cock and balls off, then feeds it to the dog. Why would I give away the details and the ending? Because I do not want you to see this movie. Please. Save yourself. Watch "Saw." At least in that one you give a shit about what happens to some of those people. I wanted these three women to just die already. Whatever made this movie go by faster, I was all for.

The only redeeming quality in the movie was the first killing scene. The blood bath. It was brutal. I could barely get through that one. The rest of the effects were cheesy and extremely gory. This was first and foremost a movie about missed opportunities. The whole idea behind "Hostel" is scary and would make for an excellent movie. Just not these movies. There was so much more they could have done with the sequel, but instead it was a tired rehash of the original complete with three travelers, one of which makes it out. Oh, and those annoying and confusing little kids from the first movie are back as well. Can somebody please tell me what these kids have to do with anything?

In summation, I love the "Saw" series. It is an example of a perfect horror trilogy. Tobin Bell, who plays Jigsaw, is signed for six movies. He died in "Saw 3!" Wow! Now that takes balls! I can't wait to see how "Saw IV" turns out when it comes out this October. My mom even looks like Jigsaw. That's how excited she is.